Archive for August, 2007

Where am I?

My body feels heavy with tire today.  I stayed out abnormally late last night labeling stuff, discussing explosives and the Armageddon, and flinching.  You know what they say about time and flying.

Anyway, the coffee was good today, oh was it ever good.

Also, it’s a half day, so I’m going home now.  Take that, suckers.


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This morning I was putzing around IMDB and landed myself on Michael Cera’s page.  I found something…puzzling.  Michael Cera was in Switching Goals?

But…I’ve seen Switching Goals.  I secretly love Switching Goals.  My favorite humor-person was IN Switching Goals as some guy named Taylor?  I was incredulous.

So it turns out people who are successful adults now

(Cera with his co-star Clark Duncan)

were at some point awkwardly-joyful pre-teens

in movies starring the Olsen Twins.

I couldn’t find a screen shot of him in the movie, but I did find this on youtube:


Woah, calm down, Taylor.

To further contrast (and really this entry is just an excuse to post this video), here is his inspiring video resume eight years later:

My how things have changed.  Now, instead of being an 11 year old, he’s a model of personal development and success.  You’re an inspiration to us all, Michael Cera.


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On Monday, I misplaced my phone.  When I realized this yesterday afternoon, naturally I began to scan our living room and kitchen for it.  For some reason, my eyes shifted outside to our porch.  Sure enough:  there it was.  I gasped as I saw it just lying there, quietly.  Outside.

You see, my concern lie in the fact that we’d had a big storm the night before.  I mean I slept right through it, but our electricity went out, so I guess it was kind of a big deal.  And due to my negligence, my phone was forced to brave the storm, sans protection, all night long.

I picked it up with dread and looked at the screen, which informed me that I had two missed calls.  It was still on??? 

I’m really amazed at electrical gadgets these days and their resilience to the damaging effects of water. I flushed my ipod down the toilet a few years ago, and that puppy survived the ordeal and is still kicking to this day.  (Go ahead and click that first link – that has since become one of my favorite moments of life). 

The phone is being a little glitchy today and there’s water inside the screen, but it’s definitely still functioning.  So, let the record show that should you choose to do so, you can douse your cell phones in water for several hours and the impact will be minimal.

The best part is now that the screen has water all up inside itself, when I talk on the phone, the screen clouds over with fog.  I guess the heat from my face + the moisture of the flooded phone = fog.

And that’s what we call science, ladies and gentlemen.

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I’m in all day meetings today, so I don’t have a lot of time to post.  A couple quick things of note:

  • They served the salad I love today for lunch.  Chicken, spinach, feta, strawberries, some sort of nut, and poppyseed dressing.  Somehow, whoever we order it from, has the combination down perfectly.  I squealed with delight and my cube neighbor instantly knew what I was so excited about (I guess I throw a joy-fit every time they serve it).
  • Did you hear about how I replaced my passenger side mirror all by myself this weekend?  Yes, ma’am.  I think I might have stumbled across a possible new career for myself:  Automobile Part-Replacer.  So far I’ve mastered headlight replacement, rear-view mirror replacement, and passenger side mirror replacement.  Maybe next I’ll learn how to replace a tire, or a transmission.
  • Anna Leisa is moving back to the ‘Sota!
  • We will have a new roommate soon.
  • What’s a transmission, again?

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Amalgamate Me!

Hello friends! There is much to say – let’s get this thing started, amalg-style.

  1. Walk it out. West side walk it out, east side walk it out. Bob Fosse. Most satisfying video ever, and I’m pretty sure I’ll never get this song out of my head. For everyone who watched this on Wednesday and Thursday, here is the original we’ve been yearning for (it’s to a song called “Mexican Breakfast”). Those ladies are amazing.
  2. I busted my passenger side mirror last week. After several trips to Welle Auto Suppy,

    I finally got my grubby little hands on a new mirror. Peter, thank your relatives for me.

  3. Went to my first pig roast. I guess when they roast the pig, the eyes kind of melt off:

    Missouri celebrates in ways I don’t quite understand. The ham was really good, though.

  4. We played Dahimi again (the “rich get richer, poor get poorer” game Bill, Ally and Hoops taught me last December). I remained in first place the entire time and after exclaiming about the joys of capitalism, Hoops, in last place, stated: “I’ll show you capitalism. I’m gonna slash all your tires.”
  5. Christine and I have the same name. Sometimes we forget, but this weekend we remembered.
  6. Ally’s soon going to have the last name Lautenschlager. I recently learned how to spell it. Ally, however, has known how to spell it for awhile now.
  7. I took the Jodi passageway to and from Columbia. I made it back today in 7 hours and 45 minutes, and that was with 6 bathroom breaks. Pretty impressive, hey ladies?

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Bubba Gump

Tonight I will dine at an establishment by the name of Bubba Gump’s.  I believe it is in someway related to that delightful Tom Hanks’ movie from the mid-90s. 

In celebration of Jordan’s homecoming, and my forthcoming Missouri trip, I will demand bucket after bucket of shrimp (the supply of shrimp at BG’s is meant to be quite vast).  I do not prefer the taste of seafood, so I will not be eating it.  What instead, do you reckon should I do with such a ludicrous amount of tiny sea animals?  Set them free?

Yes, I will set the shrimp free.  That seems right.  First I will ask my friends for help lifting the buckets (because they will be heavy) to my Malibu and then I will drive them to the Lowry bridge and dump them into the Mississippi river.

Then maybe we can head back to my house for a game of Cranium.  Hooray!  You guys, hooray!

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I am obsessive.

How many runs am I skipping this week?  Well, all of them.

You know what?  You don’t own me, running.  You don’t own me.

Okay, so I skipped Monday because it was rainy and gross.  I skipped yesterday because there was a meeting I had to get to (I did do a quarter mile sprint after getting home though, does that count?).  There are dinner plans tomorrow, so I’ll be skipping my long run for that.  And then this weekend is Missouri.

Oh man.  Obviously I’m insecure about this because I’ve pretty much asked every runner I know if skipping this week is okay.  Most have warned me against excessive skipping, but you know what?  I’m gonna have to go ahead and repeat that running doesn’t own me.  I’m just not running this week.

Flee from me, runner’s guilt!

But…is this okay?  Am I going to be screwed next week?  Is skipping these runs gonna make the marathon impossible?  It’s a kickback week, the longest run was only 12, so it’s not like I’m skipping the 18 miler or something like that.  I’m okay, right?  Emily?  Guidance?

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